To My Conservative Brothers and Sisters,
I know you are dismayed and disheartened at the results of last week's
election. You're worried that the country is heading toward a very bad
place you don't want it to go. Your 12-year Republican Revolution has
ended with so much yet to do, so many promises left unfulfilled. You
are in a funk, and I understand.
Well, cheer up, my friends! Do not despair. I have good news for
you. I, and the millions of others who are now in charge with our
Democratic Congress, have a pledge we would like to make to you, a list
of promises that we offer you because we value you as our fellow
Americans. You deserve to know what we plan to do with our newfound
power -- and, to be specific, what we will do to you and for you.
Thus, here is our Liberal's Pledge to Disheartened Conservatives:
Dear Conservatives and Republicans,
I, and my fellow signatories, hereby make these promises to you:
1. We will always respect you for your conservative beliefs. We will
never, ever, call you "unpatriotic" simply because you disagree with
us. In fact, we encourage you to dissent and disagree with us.
2. We will let you marry whomever you want, even when some of us
consider your behavior to be "different" or "immoral." Who you marry is
none of our business. Love and be in love -- it's a wonderful gift.
3. We will not spend your grandchildren's money on our personal
whims or to enrich our friends. It's your checkbook, too, and we will
balance it for you.
4. When we soon bring our sons and daughters home from Iraq, we will bring your
sons and daughters home, too. They deserve to live. We promise never to
send your kids off to war based on either a mistake or a lie.
5. When we make America the last Western democracy to have universal
health coverage, and all Americans are able to get help when they fall
ill, we promise that you, too, will be able to see a doctor, regardless
of your ability to pay. And when stem cell research delivers treatments
and cures for diseases that affect you and your loved ones, we'll make
sure those advances are available to you and your family, too.
6. Even though you have opposed environmental regulation, when we
clean up our air and water, we, the Democratic majority, will let you,
too, breathe the cleaner air and drink the purer water.
7. Should a mass murderer ever kill 3,000 people on our soil, we
will devote every single resource to tracking him down and bringing him
to justice. Immediately. We will protect you.
8. We will never stick our nose in your bedroom or your womb. What
you do there as consenting adults is your business. We will continue to
count your age from the moment you were born, not the moment you were
conceived.
9. We will not take away your hunting guns. If you need an automatic
weapon or a handgun to kill a bird or a deer, then you really aren't
much of a hunter and you should, perhaps, pick up another sport. We
will make our streets and schools as free as we can from these weapons
and we will protect your children just as we would protect ours.
10. When we raise the minimum wage, we will pay you -- and your
employees -- that new wage, too. When women are finally paid what men
make, we will pay conservative women that wage, too.
11. We will respect your religious beliefs, even when you don't put
those beliefs into practice. In fact, we will actively seek to promote
your most radical religious beliefs ("Blessed are the poor," "Blessed
are the peacemakers," "Love your enemies," "It is easier for a camel to
go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom
of God," and "Whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers
of mine, you did for me."). We will let people in other countries know
that God doesn't just bless America, he blesses everyone. We will
discourage religious intolerance and fanaticism -- starting with the
fanaticism here at home, thus setting a good example for the rest of
the world.
12. We will not tolerate politicians who are corrupt and who are bought
and paid for by the rich. We will go after any elected leader who puts
him or herself ahead of the people. And we promise you we will go after
the corrupt politicians on our side FIRST. If we fail to do this, we
need you to call us on it. Simply because we are in power does not give
us the right to turn our heads the other way when our party goes
astray. Please perform this important duty as the loyal opposition.
I promise all of the above to you because this is your country, too.
You are every bit as American as we are. We are all in this together.
We sink or swim as one. Thank you for your years of service to this
country and for giving us the opportunity to see if we can make things
a bit better for our 300 million fellow Americans -- and for the rest
of the world.
Thanks Michael Moore for this awesome letter that speaks what our party is really about
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